Happy Birthday to Me

So, I'm thirty years old today.

(This picture is from two weeks ago at Sea World, but that seemed recent enough.)

I don't feel differently. I don't know what I expected, not that I thought there'd be any dramatic difference or anything, but today feels like any other day. Except that today I turn thirty. And that's pretty cool. I don't mind turning thirty (not that I had a choice or anything), in fact, thirty feels good. Really good. I look at thirty and quickly realize I am happier, healthier and better off than I was at twenty, and that's a pretty cool feeling. I have an amazing husband, two beautiful girls, a great life, a cute home, a lot of new and old friends, surrounded by supportive and loving family, have a community I love to live in, a great ward to be a part of, and I am really, really happy. Happier than I ever have been before. So what's so bad about time moving forward when things just keep getting better?

The one slightly sour note on the day, is that Greg has to work. From like 5:30AM to 6:30PM, so I won't see him much today. As the single most important person in my life, it'd be nice to have him here on my birthday, but it's not a huge deal. I have recently discovered that I'm not really the most sentimental person when it comes to 'days'. Do I want to celebrate my birthday with my husband. Of course. But I don't care if we do that today, next week, next weekend. Whenever. Same with our Anniversary. I'm not someone who really cares about Valentines Day at all; I wouldn't mind going out to celebrate it with my husband, but no way will I go out on the actual 14th, since everything's so crowded. We just celebrated Ellie's first birthday, a pretty big milestone in life, and yet we didn't open presents on her actual birthday, or even the next . . . we just waited 'til she was in a relatively good mood and then did it then. I'm just realizing recently that although it is important to me to celebrate life's events and markers, I just don't really care when I do it. Kinda makes me think back to my Memorial Day post, making me better understand my thoughts on the cemetery thing. I think it comes down to I feel it is vitally important to remember those who aren't with us anymore. To pay homage to those who sacrificed or went on before us. I think cemeteries are sacred ground (probably part of the reason that lawn chairs and picnics there kinda weird me out -- not that I think that's wrong, it's just odd to me), that are due proper respect and even a little reverence. I think our children are better people if they have at least some understanding of where we come from, what makes our family what it is. I think it's important to remember my little sister, the role and standing she has in our family, even if she's not here with us. I think going to her graveside and helping to cut back any over growth, going and getting water and washing off her headstone and placing beautiful new flowers in her vase was an important part of my upbringing. But to me, there's something about an arbitrary day picked when everyone shows up and overcrowds a place I usually find peaceful and private. I think that's just another reason why I'm not a big 'spend the day at the cemetery on Memorial Day' type of person. I do, however, feel that any excuse to get together with family is worthwhile, especially if it so happens to be a three day weekend. Anyway, back to the original point . . . yeah, today is my birthday. It's a relatively big deal, a celebration or marking of the day I was born. But when I celebrate it doesn't so much matter to me. Just that there's a little celebration on my behalf. :-)