Summer Days

Despite the blistering heat (which I was just not made for) and the ginormous water bills, August can still be a pretty fun month. And the two highlights of the month for us are both courtesy of Greg's work . . . there's the totally awesome Kennecott Employee Appreciation Night (that's just what I call it, I don't remember if it has an 'official' name or not) held at the Real Soccer Stadium. There's face painting, playing on the soccer field, tons of food, balloon animals, snow cones, and our favorite, the movie. You throw out some blankets, grab some popcorn, and they play "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" on the big screen. So much fun.

Then, as if throwing parties and writing Greg's paycheck weren't enough, Kennecott goes all out with one more giant step towards winning all my love and affection. In fact, at this point Kennecott could pretty much talk me into getting an "I Love Kennecott!" tattoo on my forearm. (Don't waste your time though Kennecott, Greg totally wouldn't allow me to do it.) Every summer they mail us Family Passes to several local family fun venues, each to be used at some point during the month of August. We've already been to the Dinosaur museum, and yesterday Greg took the girls to the Thanksgiving Point Farm, and today we met up with my sister Talina (who took a LONG lunch) and went to This is the Place Heritage Park. And we still have half a dozen other places we still need to get in this month!

Here's some pictures from the last couple days . . .

Greg got some pictures of the girls at the Farm.

Ellie LOVED riding the horses (and in the last two days has had about 6 or 7 opportunities to do so! Thanks again, Kennecott! Love you!)

Annie on a horse.

Annie with her hip cocked all sassily in front of the chicken coop.

Another horse ride.

Ellie's so proud of herself.

Annie & Ellie came home just gushing to me about all the fake cows you can sit on at Thanksgiving Point. It's the simple things in life . . .

This is unrelated to all the Kennecott-financed goodness, but one of our sweet neighbors gave us some hand me downs. Some for Annie, some for Ellie and a ton for Isaac. It was like Christmas. Here is Ellie in her favorite dress . . .

Here's Greg and Ellie holding Isaac. I'd just asked Greg to take the baby, when Ellie came running up, arms outstretched, crying out, "La la take! La la take!" (La la being her name for herself . . . she wanted me to hand her the baby, as she was just standing there with arms outstretched . . . we compromised, and she got to hold her brother on Daddy's lap.)

Isaac was less thrilled by the situation.

Close up of Daddy and Isaac's face squished up together.

Ellie wanted to get in on this, so Greg told her, "Come squish in with Daddy and Isaac . . ."
Which is why she has her hand pressing her face into Greg's . . . she was 'squishing' the best she could. :-)

Isaac chilling on Greg's arm. We find this position, him slung over an arm, keeps him the happiest most of the time.

Back to our summer of fun provided by Kennecott . . .
Here's Isaac in the sling at This is the Place Heritage Park.

Our little cowgirl again. Aunt Talina asked her what a horse says and Ellie enthusiastically shouted out, "Yee Haw!"

Annie atop her mighty steed . . .

Ellie loved chasing around after the animals and petting them. She kept getting right down on their level talking to them.

Annie hanging out inside some replica ship.

Annie and Aunt Talina hanging out on the ship's deck.

Greg, Ellie and Annie riding the little train. We rode the little and big trains a lot. It beat trying to get two kids to walk all day in the heat.

Isaac and Mommy cuddling in the shade. In his second outfit for the day -- after blowing out a diaper of epic proportions, decimating not only his clothes, but also the sling I'd been carrying him in. I'd packed a change of clothes, but with only one sling, I had to just carry him the rest of the time. Surprising how much 10-12 lbs. feels like after a couple hours.

Aunt Talina with Annie & Ellie on the little train again.

Annie sporting a 'coonskin cap and a wooden horse.

Isaac's first time in a coonskin cap . . . slept right through it.
Greg and I have found that taking pictures of our babies in gift shops wearing memorable hats beats actually paying for them. A picture lasts longer than touristy crap. :-)
(We have pictures of a sleeping Annie -- at about the same age -- in a Hogle Zoo hat).

Ellie takes fake-horseback riding as seriously as real horseback riding.

Playing in the village of miniature houses.

Isaac sleeping in his favorite position . . .

Ellie driving the wood train. She loved this wheel. She ended up spending a couple minutes in time out because she refused to share said wheel with other children. Always fun to have the non-sharing, then angry-crying-in-time-out child in public. But hey, as long as we're parents who notice our child isn't sharing and react by going and removing her from the situation and put her in time out, I'm happy.

It was so much fun. We were there for hours, but barely saw a fraction of the place. We've been there twice now, and I swear we've barely scratched the surface. Partly 'cause our kids are so young, and we spend a lot of time riding the train and all, but I think you could spend two days there without repeating anything . . .

Back Sleeping?

Kerry asked in a comment about how I sleep my babies, back or side?

Ironically, I had just read a blog post about the topic of sleeping position just last night, and had commented on it and so this was already on my mind. (Kerry, you're psychic! Or tracking my browser history.) :-)

I slept my girls on their backs mainly -- pretty much 'cause they slept in either a bouncy chair or swing until they were pretty much old enough to turn into whatever position they wanted. So they mainly slept on their backs. Although I'm convinced they never slept long enough stretches to do any reshaping of their skulls! :-) With Annie being so spitty, we'd actually wanted her sleeping her on her side, on an incline. But since it turned out she'd only sleep in a bouncy chair, she was on her back, but her head was still elevated.

With Isaac, I planned on sleeping him however he slept best. (We ended up sleeping him on his back while swaddled at night -- during the day, for naps, he sleeps on his side(s).) I know the recommendation -- "Back to Sleep". The whole SIDS connection. That back sleeping is supposed to be the safest thing for the baby.

But I'd planned on sleeping him on his side, back or even (gasp) his stomach . . . whatever worked best and felt right. Which might be surprising to some, since I had a sister who passed away due to SIDS (while sleeping on her stomach -- the 'recommendation' at the time.)

It's actually because of our family's loss that I feel comfortable bucking the pediatrician's dire warnings. My sister didn't pass away because she was sleeping on her stomach. I believe she would've passed away no matter her sleeping position. She peacefully passed away because her body was going to, no matter what. This gets into my personal beliefs and relationship with God, so it obviously won't ring true for everyone, but for me, I believe that there are babies, that for whatever reason, are only meant to live for so long and then it's their time to go. This was the case with my sister. My Mom knew during her pregnancy that something was different with this baby, and countless other SIDS-Mom's that she talked to knew that their baby wasn't going to live long, some from the very beginning of their pregnancy. There are factors that seem to put babies at increased risk, but I believed that if I did what I felt was best, as their Mother, that my babies would be just fine. I wasn't going to make one 'bad' decision that doomed my child to crib death -- if it happened, it was because it was meant to. It wasn't in my hands, it was in God's. And the chances of it happening were slim. I just had faith that my mother's intuition wouldn't let me put my children at any additional risk. My plan was to sleep Isaac however worked best for him, and got us all the most sleep. Turns out that's probably side sleep -- since his day time naps rock (he'll take a few 2 hour naps a day while in his bassinet on his side). At night he doesn't sleep as well on his side, and needs to be swaddled -- and he'll sleep one longer stretch, but the rest of the night it's hard to get him back down. He prefers sleeping the rest of the night on his side in the crook of my arm, if he has it his way (which frankly, he usually does.) :-)
All that said -- since side and back sleep work, I haven't pushed stomach sleeping (despite the fact I actually personally believe that stomach sleep is the best for babies development and muscle control, and believe that back sleeping is the reason that all of my kids (and friends kids) crawled and walked later than my Mom's stomach sleeping children did by several months) -- so I guess the 'Back to Sleep' campaign has done it's job enough to keep even me from just putting their babies on their stomachs all willy-nilly. :-) I believe there are probably pros and cons to both sleeping positions (well, all three, with side lying). I think people need to do what feels best to them.

So that's my own two cents. I really liked a lot of what the blog post I linked to earlier had to say, some highlights being:

It's also important to note that while the number of SIDS diagnoses went down drastically [with the Back-to-Sleep campaign], the overall number of infant deaths hardly changed - just the number of SIDS diagnoses (by the way, the only way to really diagnose SIDS is to rule out every other possible cause of death.) It's also important to note that during this period- where the reduction in SIDS deaths is tied to just back-sleeping- there was a huge cultural push for breastfeeding (shown to reduce your SIDS risk by 2 or 3 times) and stopping second-hand smoke, and could also be tied to the drop in SIDS deaths.

. . . .

In other words, there is a set of risks, whether you sleep your baby on the belly or their back. I won't judge a mother either way. The risk of SIDS for a normal, healthy baby is very small compared to the risks that come from back-sleeping, but obviously death is infinitely more tragic than an asymmetrical head or hitting milestones a few months later. I do think that parents of babies that are more prone to SIDS (respiratory problems, prematurity, diagnosed apnea, snoring...) should consider follow all possible SIDS guidelines to the letter. But if a mommy lets her baby sleep on his or her belly, it's possible that instead of being a negligent parent, they are choosing a different set of (scientifically based) benefits and risks - longer sleep periods, deeper sleep, and more likely to meet milestones on time.
If it's worth the risk to you, then go for it. I do. I personally feel that letting my baby sleep deeply is more important than the small risk of SIDS. But, I also understand that there's validity to valuing protection from SIDS above deep sleep. I really don't think you'd be "right" or "wrong" either way- or rather, I think both ways can be right, depending on what risks you're most comfortable with. No mother should ever feel judged for making an informed decision.

5 Weeks Old

"You crack me up, Mom!"

"Mom, you're pretty funny.""You're mildly amusing now."

"You're still talking?"

Then some pictures of the girls at this age:

Two things come to mind when I see those pictures:
1.) These are probably the two times Annie ever slept at this age :-) We must've taken the pictures to document it for posterity :-)
2.) Dang, Ellie was a CHUNK! :-) I forgot how much she packed it on (her short little frame) those first couple months! (It didn't last though -- at 6 months old she was just over 13 lbs and barely still on the chart.)

Edited to add:

This was from a week ago, but since his sisters both had 'sleeping' photos, I felt he deserved one too. :-)

Isaac's Photo Shoot

Remember back when Isaac was two and a half weeks old and had his first professional photo shoot with someone who not only owns a nice camera, but knows how to work miracles with it? (Hi Gianne!)

Well, now we have the CD and here's some of our favorites:

In other news, Isaac's already in size 2 diapers. That happened fast. I returned two boxes of size 1's to Target today. He's getting so big!

Here We Go Again . . .

Yesterday, my two girls had been anxiously waiting all morning to go to the Splash Park for Mom & Me. I'd told them about it during breakfast, then wanted to kick myself for it the rest of the morning, as Isaac screamed for a solid hour. All I could think was, "I don't want to take him in public, I don't want to take him in public . . . " Annie very sweetly took in the whole situation and said, "Mom, I know Ellie and me want to go to Mom & Me, but if today's not a good day, that's OK. I understand." It made my heart melt and break all at the same time.*

It's hard for me to listen to one of my babies scream. It's harder when I'm surrounded by other people also getting to 'enjoy' my child's frantic cries. It's hardest when I'm surrounded by people I know listening to the screaming. I try not to be embarrassed, but I am. Not just of the noise and distraction of a freaked out baby, but of what I think people must think. Or what they do think and then say out loud to me. I can't even count all the times a well meaning stranger has approached me in a grocery store and said something 'helpful' like, "Oh, listen to that poor baby . . . she must be hungry . . . [in babyish tone] Are you hungry? Do you wish you were at home being fed instead of out shopping?" It's always made me want to either yell, or break down in tears, and exclaim, "I don't just take them out while they're starving for the fun of it! I fed them RIGHT before we left. They also have a clean diaper, have been burped and just had a nap. Sometimes babies just cry. Especially mine!" There's this loudly spoken idea (vs. a non-spoken one) that Mom's 'just know' what their babies need. That Mom's inherently understand each little cry, that they can decipher what they mean as clearly as if they had a Mom to Baby translation book. This has always been hard for me, a source of deep guilt, 'cause when my kids are in the throes of colic, I don't have clue one what the heck they want. I go through it all, I check the diaper, feed the baby, and try and get them to sleep if the timing makes sense -- but mainly I feel like I'm just taking stabs in the dark, guessing at anything that might be causing my child to be unbelievably grumpy. People expect Mom's to know what to do, to know what baby wants. And when you're the Mom who suddenly gets outed as being clueless, it's a bit humiliating.

My friends, family and neighbors know I've had colicky babies. Most everyone's been really sweet, supportive and sympathetic to what we went through with our girls. But, to have yet another one starting to show signs of, at a minimum, extreme fussiness, is discouraging and oddly embarrassing. Like I can't help but wonder if people are thinking, "Three out of three kids . . . must be something she's doing." I ask myself a thousand times a day what I'm doing wrong. 10-20% of babies are supposed to be colicky. It's looking like 100% at our house. I'm throwin' off the curve here, and I can't help but obsess about what I've done to cause it. I have watched people sit there uncomfortably as they listen to my baby cry, silently wondering why I couldn't do more for him. The worst though is when someone will be holding one of my babies, and the screaming ends up becoming too much, so they give the baby back to Mom, since that'll calm them down, right? Um, no. Everyone expects that when you hand a fussy baby to Mom, they'll settle in happily against Mom's chest and instantly become silent -- or better still -- coo in delight. Yeah, when you hand one of my screaming infants back to me, they pretty much just keep screaming. It's mildly humiliating to me when it suddenly dawns on someone that I can't do anything to calm my baby.

I had this fairly mellow baby for weeks with Isaac, then the last four or five days, Isaac has started screaming a couple hours of the day. He was the baby that when fussing could be handed back to Mom and he'd just melt and quiet instantly. Not so much anymore. I'm as powerless to calm a freak out as most anybody else now. It's hard. He's still taking great naps and is getting a lot of sleep (far more than my girls ever did.) Although he has doubled the number of night wakings, which was really sad after he had one 6 hour stretch between feedings one night, then the next night he woke up almost hourly. So nighttime sucks -- but what's hardest is watching him scream during the day. We've tried, well not everything, but almost. Everything we can think of. Swings, bouncy chairs, slings, front carriers, long walks outside, long walks in Costco, binkies, nursing repeatedly, vibration, noise, blow dryers running, vacuum going, attempting a milk-free diet for me, tight swaddling, loose swaddling, side laying, stomach pressure, bouncing, singing, dancing, jiggling, skin to skin, cuddling . . . and some of it will calm him down some of the time. But what works constantly changes. And sometimes nothing calms him down. He went from sleeping happily in his bassinet, being placed there while drowsy then dropping off into slumber land after a few minutes, to taking 50 minutes to fall asleep (while 'barely keep my eyes open' tired) in a swing or sling. I felt like we were 'doing everything right' with him . . . and it was all working so well, until it suddenly doesn't anymore and I feel lost and clueless and a little desperate.

This probably explains why I haven't blogged all week. What can I write, "Another crappy day of screaming and tears . . . mostly on the part of the baby, but the girls and I all contributed too." It just gets kinda depressing to record, "Baby woke up every hour all night, then screamed most of the day" over and over again. I thought we'd dodged this bullet this time. He was calm for so long. He went weeks without showing any of the 'signs'. And suddenly we're hearing full blown screaming for hours a day. And I feel a little duped.


*Oh, and we did make it to the Splash Park, and stayed a whole hour. Isaac screamed for awhile, but eventually fell asleep in his sling. Until he woke up 20 minutes or so later, freaking out. Then I decided to take them all home. But, the girls were able to go and have fun with friends for an hour or so, despite my fears of taking Senor Fussy Pants out into public. Go me!

Comparisons

I took some picture of Isaac workin' on tummy time on his Boppy this morning.
Once I uploaded them, I couldn't help but feel all nostalgic for similar pictures taken of the girls . . . so I'm putting some of each of the kids on the Boppy around this age, just for comparison sake :-)

Isaac first -- you can tell it's him 'cause he's wearing blue. And has the bluest eyes. And the narrowest face.

Ellie -- this first one isn't on the Boppy, but it's the same age as Isaac is now. I forgot how quickly she just plumped up! She didn't weigh anywhere near what Isaac does, but she was a lot shorter, so all her weight was in her cheeks. :-)

Ellie on the Boppy, about three weeks older than Isaac is now though.

Here's Annie right around the same age as Isaac is now.
You can tell it's her 'cause of the bald top of her head, with the cool monk like hair around the back. She had the funniest looking hair there for awhile.

These pictures made me think a few things:
1.) My children have very little hair at this age.
2.) I'd always thought of Isaac as looking more like Ellie (and he did at birth), but these pictures looked more like Annie to me. But a lot of that, I'm sure, is the sheer plumpedness of Ellie in those pictures.
3.) My girls look downright lazy on the Boppy -- they're both slumped over like, "Dang, the sheer weight of our heads is getting us down . . ." Of course, they did both have larger heads than their brother. :-)