A Little Miracle

I don't have any nieces yet. A couple of unbelievably adorable nephews, but no nieces. So, you can imagine how excited I was to find out one of my closest friends, Jessi, was having a little girl. She was due about 2 months after I was, and Jessi and I were having fun being pregnant together and planning for our children (maybe not their actual wedding, but at the least, their inevitable friendship.) :-) This was Jessi's first baby, whereas she'd been spoiling my children for years, so I was looking forward to passing on boxes of girl clothes and buying frilly baby things again. We were enjoying being pregnant together -- meeting up at Village Inn for hours of talking about Hypnobabies and childbirth and pregnancy and babies and children and parenthood and all the ups and downs. Everything was going so perfectly. Jessi had just had her ultrasound and had her first glimpse at her perfectly healthy little girl. When just a few weeks later, her blood pressure started giving her problems. I was very 'Pollyanna-ish' about it -- just one of those pregnancy things, I'm sure everything was fine. But Jessi's midwife was, fortunately, a bit more reality-based and long story short, Jessi ended up in the hospital. She was able to come home soon though, and I chalked it up to a fluke. They just needed to figure out the appropriate blood pressure medicine dosage, and everything would be perfect. A few weeks later though, more tests and ultrasounds were showing that both Jessi and the baby were in trouble. Jessi's placenta wasn't doing it's full share of the work, and baby Quinn wasn't growing as quickly as she should. At the same time, they were still concerned about Jessi's blood pressure. She was hospitalized again, this time for good, so that they could watch her and the baby closely until she gave birth. This was early May. Jessi's due date was August 27th. I was horrified that this was happening to people I cared about so much -- the reality of the situation was scary. Which is probably why I tried to go a little longer in "Pollyanna" mode. Jessi was pretty much just waiting until the day the doctor's would tell her the baby was no longer being sustained by the placenta and would need to be born early. That could be weeks away, or tomorrow. I focused on the weeks away. I brought supplies to the hospital to make a paper chain -- since Jessi wasn't counting to a due date anymore, we decided we'd count 'up' instead . . . a paper link for each day she was there, seeing how long she could get the chain before her baby had to enter the world too early. I brought something like 60 pieces of paper all cut up for the links. Jessi probably wanted to slap me. :-) I was a little overly hopeful and naive at this point. Jessi and I joked about having our babies on the same day -- July 4th. I said I was willing to hold on an extra five days (my due date being June 30th), even if it meant my parents would be out of town, if she'd just hold on a couple more months. When I'd think about it though, all I could of was how even by some miracle Jessi could stay pregnant until the 4th of July, she'd still be having a preemie born dangerously early. This was mind boggling to me. But I prayed, pretty much around the clock, that Jessi's baby would be able to stay inside her Mama as long as possible. But, it was only a day or so later that the ultrasound showed the inevitable, that it was time for baby Quinn to come meet the world. I was walking to the park with my kids in a wagon when I got the text that they were doing the c-section that day. I lost it. I burst into tears, and hit the sidewalk. I sat there next to my kids' wagon, just sobbing, while my children stared at me like I'd lost my mind. Jessi was 25 weeks pregnant. To the day. At best, they would be expecting a one and a half to two pound baby. But because Quinn's growth had been compromised due to the failing placenta, I got a text later that day. She weighed one pound. At this point, I very idiotically assumed the text had cut off, and I texted back to Jessi, "How big was she? The text cut off, one pound and what?" (Sorry about that Jessi! I felt really bad when I got the text back that she weighed exactly one pound . . . I hadn't meant to come across as shocked (which I was) and forcing you to repeat it . . . I just couldn't believe that the text hadn't just somehow magically cut off the ounces.) In fact, Quinn wasn't even quite a full pound, weighing in at 15.5 ounces.

This is where Google becomes your best friend and worst enemy. A one pound baby's chance of survival. It's all over the internet. You can find many stories of people whose children survived. You can also find touching tributes to micro-preemies who didn't survive. You can find lists of complications and dangers of being born so early. I got the first pictures of Quinn from Jessi -- she was so incomprehensibly tiny. And beautiful. I marveled at this perfectly formed tiny baby.

Quinn's little foot at 2 days old

It was terrifying -- I can't even imagine what Jessi and her family were going through. I cried often. I prayed even more. I couldn't stop thinking about them. For days, Jessi and I texted each other. She wasn't at a place where she was ready to talk to people in person, but she kept me remarkably up to date through phones/email.

Quinn's footprints at 2 weeks old

Those first few weeks went so very slowly. Quinn was so little, and barely gaining. I can't even imagine what Jessi's world was like during all of this -- blood transfusions, arterial lines, Quinn's belly not wanting to work. Jessi waited weeks to hold her baby. Amazingly though, Quinn didn't suffer from any serious complications common to such tiny, early babies. No brain bleeds, no serious bowel issues. And then she started to grow. And grow. And grow.

The first time I saw her in person she was two and a half pounds. And over 13 inches long.

Quinn around the time I first saw her in the NICU

She was so small, but so perfect and beautiful, that staring at her through the isolette, it was easy to imagine her being a full size baby that I was looking at from farther away. I was so amazed by her. You really feel like you're in the presence of a tiny, living, breathing miracle.

She is strong and fiesty and full of personality. Always has been. She loves her binkie, and has become a seasoned pro at nursing. She smiles. Such gorgeous smiles. She's the best dressed baby in NICU. The girl sports the best looking bows around. And she's long since grown out of her entire preemie wardrobe.

Her due date came and went last month. She was officially a full term baby now (at 15 weeks old). She reached an impressive 6 lb. 7 oz. and was 17 and a half inches long by her due date. 

Around the time of her due date

Another due date-ish picture

But the NICU stay was far from over.  There were several more weeks of growing and maturing and getting ready to be released to the anxiously waiting arms of her Mom & Dad.

Only now, a month or so later, weighing in at over 8 lbs, little Quinn is home with Mommy & Daddy tonight. 

It's about time, and I couldn't be happier for them! 

Still in the hospital, but close to coming home

Still in the hospital, but showing her true (and right) colors!  :-)

Home Sweet Home -- Quinn in her own bed!